{"id":278211,"date":"2025-04-09T20:55:29","date_gmt":"2025-04-09T20:55:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/news.talkwithrattan.com\/index.php\/2025\/04\/09\/a-real-pain-jesse-eisenbergs-masterclass-on-tackling-loss-grief-with-humour\/"},"modified":"2025-04-09T20:55:29","modified_gmt":"2025-04-09T20:55:29","slug":"a-real-pain-jesse-eisenbergs-masterclass-on-tackling-loss-grief-with-humour","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/news.talkwithrattan.com\/index.php\/2025\/04\/09\/a-real-pain-jesse-eisenbergs-masterclass-on-tackling-loss-grief-with-humour\/","title":{"rendered":"\u2018A Real Pain\u2019: Jesse Eisenberg\u2019s masterclass on tackling loss, grief with humour"},"content":{"rendered":"
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When a child resists taking medicine, a mother may offer candy to soften the bitterness. Comedy plays a similar role in grief\u2014it provides sweetness to help endure pain. Jesse Eisenberg\u2019s new film A Real Pain<\/em> explores this dynamic beautifully.<\/p>\n

The film follows Jewish-American cousins David and Benji, thrust into each other\u2019s lives after the death of their grandmother. They couldn\u2019t be more different\u2014David, cautious and introspective, has a family, and abides by the \u201crules of the society,\u201d while Benji is lonely, and hides his insecurities behind irreverent humour. Their trip to Poland, meant to honour their grandmother\u2019s memory, turns into an exploration of identity, grief, and clashing coping mechanisms\u2014solemnity versus jest.<\/p>\n

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Their journey forces them to confront family history and their fraught relationship. Along the way, they join a Holocaust tour group, encounter absurd and poignant moments, and navigate the challenges of understanding a past that\u2019s deeply personal and universally impactful.<\/p>\n

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In one of the scenes, the tour group arrives at a museum-like place with statues of Warsaw fighters who sacrificed their lives during the uprising. The Warsaw Uprising is not something remembered with a smile\u2014it\u2019s a sombre memory steeped in tragedy and loss. But when the film reaches this solemn point, humour steps in, offering a unique perspective to navigate the weight of history.<\/p>\n

\"A A still from the movie \u2018A Real Pain\u2019<\/span><\/p>\n

Kieran Culkin\u2019s character, Benji, asks another member of the tour group, Eloge (Kurt Egyiawan), to take a photo of him with his cousin David (Jesse Eisenberg) posing with the statues. \u201cSorry, what?\u201d David responds, clearly uneasy. \u201cWe should pose with the guys. It\u2019ll be hysterical,\u201d Benji replies with his trademark irreverence. David refuses, calling it disrespectful. Undeterred, Benji invites Eloge, saying, \u201cYou gonna enlist?\u201d Eloge, reluctant but amused, replies, \u201cI\u2019m not a fighter, Benji,\u201d only for Benji to retort, \u201cYou can be a medic or something; these people need help.\u201d What begins as absurdity transforms into a comedic reprieve when Eloge, smiling, concedes, \u201cThis is so silly.\u201d<\/p>\n

Silly, zany, and even irreverent comedy become coping mechanisms in A Real Pain<\/em><\/a>. Humour, in this context, doesn\u2019t trivialise pain; it makes it bearable.<\/p>\n

Why humour is needed in subject-heavy films<\/strong><\/p>\n

However, this balancing act is not unique to A Real Pain<\/em>. Films like Jojo Rabbit<\/em> have also employed humour to reframe narratives of historical trauma. Taika Waititi\u2019s Oscar-winning film tells the story of a young boy in Nazi Germany whose imaginary friend is a bumbling version of Adolf Hitler. The absurdity of the premise could have been offensive, but instead, it disarms the audience. Humanising the protagonist\u2019s naivete allows viewers to see the war through his innocent, conflicted eyes.<\/p>\n

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In both the films, comedy acts as a bridge between the past and the present. These films take heavy, often retold subjects like World War II and the Holocaust and present them in ways that feel fresh and accessible. This isn\u2019t about making light of the tragedies but rather about finding a new language to engage with them. As critic Roger Ebert once said, \u201cMovies are the most powerful empathy machine in all the arts.\u201d Humour enhances that empathy by involving audiences who might otherwise shy away from such sombre topics.<\/p>\n

In A Real Pain<\/em>, jocularity serves to invite new audiences into the conversation. It\u2019s not that the topic has been done to death\u2014stories of human resilience and tragedy during these times will always need retelling\u2014but presenting it on a lighter note ensures the stories remain relatable and compelling. For a younger audience, who may not have a direct connection to these events, comedy becomes an entry point to understanding the profound.<\/p>\n

Benji<\/strong><\/p>\n

Portrayed with remarkable nuance by Culkin, Benji is the heart of A Real Pain<\/em>\u2019s humour. He is always joking around, doing everything he can to lighten the mood for those around him. He exudes a relentless desire to make people laugh, as if his sole purpose is to ensure no one feels the weight of silence or sadness. But as the story unfolds, it\u2019s revealed that beneath his playful facade lies untold struggles \u2013\u2013 losing his grandmother, feeling distant from his cousin, loneliness, and even an attempt to take his life, months before the events of the film.<\/p>\n

\"Kieran Kieran Culkin\u2019s character Benji in \u2018A Real Pain\u2019<\/span><\/p>\n

This revelation recontextualises his persona, transforming it from simple comedic relief into something far more layered. Benji\u2019s relentless joking is no longer just about making others happy; it\u2019s about protecting himself from the darkness that constantly threatens to consume him. His humour becomes his armour, a way to keep the world at a distance and avoid confronting his own pain.<\/p>\n

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The real-life role of humour in grief<\/strong><\/p>\n

Outside of cinema, sarcasm and wit are universal coping mechanisms. Think of the awkward jokes cracked at funerals, the dark humour shared by first responders, or the memes people create and share during crises. These moments of levity aren\u2019t about dismissing grief; they\u2019re about finding a way to endure it.<\/p>\n

This idea is beautifully captured in another scene from A Real Pain<\/em>, where David and Benji find themselves in the middle of a chaotic situation after missing a train. In their quest to find a solution to it, they go through a mini adventure that changes the mood of the situation. The scene is a reminder that even in desperation, there\u2019s room for joy.<\/p>\n

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